New Year, Novel YOU

Ya'll.

What is up?!

I feel like I'm finally on a roll with this shit again.

Time will tell.

Quick Abigail update before the point:
because I can't ever just focus on the point and be done with it

In case you're wondering, - of COURSE you are - I have taken a hiatus from the social media. Yes, the social media. Facebook (except to leave blog announcements and the response to random messages), IG, Snapchat - they've all gone to the shitter and I don't plan on unearthing them any time soon. This would be the reason why my feeds are ghosttowns and if someone has reached out to me, why I have not reached back. Now you know. It felt weird to make an announcement that I would be leaving as if it would really change the make-up of someone's day: Hear, ye! Hear, ye! Her majesty Abigail, the only person you care about on social media, is taking her leave. Your lives will all be drastically altered from this point forward.

Weird, right? I thought so too.

I felt like a crack addict my first few days, but now I only get the itch to check my phone 100 times a day instead of 300 (500?) only to remember I have nothing left to check (except for my now pristine e-mail inbox) because my social life is a gaping abyss I scream into with desperation. Just kidding. -Ahem- Moving on!

It has been oddly uplifting and relieving not to have a cellular device super-glued to my fingers and face waiting on the next like or comment, comparing my life to others'. I do also feel very out-of-the-loop and disconnected, which is a strange feeling when you grew up the same way and survived just fine without all the social media chaos. (God, I feel like a dinosaur. Kids these days (those poor, unfortunate souls) don't even know the bliss of which they have been deprived. Snooze, ya lose, suckaaaas.)

So, that's what's up with me and I hope no one has felt offended having not gotten a response from me. (Feel free to text me if you feel the need to see my face.)

-awkward subject-change elevator music inserted here-

Although I got rid of the social media before the New Year, this course of action has brought with it some considerations of resolutions. However, because I don't buy-in to the whole resolutions stocks, I am going to make a list of resolutions for those of you who would like to pick resolution apples from my New Year tree. And, instead of going along the tradition of actions to be done in the new year, I am going to mainly focus on things not to do. So pretty much, you get to be lazy af. 

YOU. ARE. WELCOME!

Abigail's Handy-Dandy, Stop-Doing-It Resolutions Tree:
in no particular order

• Don't give in to social media. 
• For the most part, it's all hype and it's all staged. It is so easy to get wrapped up in comparing what people let you see and your own life. Smoke and mirrors, people, smoke and motherfucking mirrors. Embrace distancing yourself, if necessary. Those who are genuinely concerned about your absence will reach out.
• Don't be intimidated by the future. 
• Set your sights on a dream - (becoming a successful musician), a long-term goal (running a marathon), a short-term goal (eating a large pizza by yourself in one sitting) - and murder it. The hoops you may have to jump through will not be as painful as never reaching what you want most and settling into that newly attained desire will not be scary once you get there. Fire and fury is the rite of passage to freedom.
• Don't be afraid to make a move: physically, professionally, intellectually, socially. 
• Want to move out of the home you're in? Mulling over traveling? Tired of your job or want to move up in the ranks? Been meaning to complete your degree, start a new one, or just want to learn a new trade? Really tired of shit relationships you have or wanting to grow new ones? Get your ducks in a line and do it, Nike style.
• Do not let others determine your worth.
• Some people, maybe even those closest to you, will never get you (and some don't even care to try.) They will make you feel that the things you want, the things that make you happy, and who you are are either too much, too far out of reach for you, or just plain stupid. Throw a middle finger and a duece in their face and peace the fuck out. There's no sense in wasting another year on that bullshit.
• Don't let someone belittle you.
• Some people, even those closest to you, need to shrink you down so that you can't hold a mirror up to them. Do not let someone convince you to fit into a cookie-cutter of the person they think you should be because they want to avoid seeing their own mistakes so that they do not feel compelled to better themselves, or because they need to out-shine you. (Now, if you're just an asshole who's using this to continue being an asshole, this is not for you. You're just an asshole. Evaluate yourself and make changes...asshole.)
• Do not allow someone to make you mistrust yourself.
• Look at the signs. See beyond the problem. Configure the equation. Solve it. Do not look back.
• Don't mourn those that do not value you.
• Did the McDonald's employee forget your chicken nuggets? Kindly let 'em know and move on. Has your friend not really been a friend at all? Recognize it. Cut 'em loose and seek someone that will respect you equally. Did a love interest wound you beyond forgiveness? Accept it. Recognize the true person they are. Learn from it. Move forward remaining open to worthier possibilities.
• Don't sacrifice your happiness for someone else's.
• Seek to find mutual happiness. If this is not possible, book it out of there. Time is too precious to minimize your bliss for someone else.
• Don't be too intimidated to stretch your comfort zone.
• If you can't convince yourself to reach out of your comfort zone entirely, find a compromise. If you want to try a new place of worship and you're nervous, take a friend. If you're too scared to skydive, iFly. Do what you can with what you have to make progress.
• Don't accept excuses instead of answers.
• from yourself, your government, your colleagues, your significant others, your friends You aren't crazy, paranoid, or obsessive to want legitimate reasons. You deserve them.
• Do not reduce yourself to let others shine.
• You are worthy of your own recognition and someone else's accomplishments do not overshadow yours.
• Do not be afraid to stick your neck out.
• Determine what is worth the risk and commit to a person, to a movement, to a lifestyle.
• Don't be afraid to be kind.
• Some will take advantage while others' lives will be changed. Buy someone coffee, dinner. Offer someone a compliment without any strings attached.
• Don't shy away from starting over.
• What a privilege it is to have a do-over. Make the most of it.
• Don't hesitate to walk away from toxic situations or toxic people.
• All you need is to know that they are not good for you, you deserve better, and muster the strength to close the door and bolt it.

Some of you had a terrible 2017. Some of you had a fantastic year. Some, I'm sure, were just average. If your year wasn't so hot, you get another chance to beast the fuck out of this one. If your year was all you could hope for, hope for more this year. If your year wasn't really notable, do something to tip the scales. Either way, be good to yourself this year. Love yourself with patience and intention and fuck the people that get in the way of that. Feel free to pick from my New Year tree througout the year and take a big, juicy bite. It may start out bitter, but it'll sweeten right up in the end.

amg

✊